Reckoning Chats
April 2025
I have been inhaling various media as I learn more about my biological heritage and adoption journey.
https://www.npr.org/.../after-complaints-south-korea...
https://www.bbc.com/news/articles/cwyjryv1kpgo
As an adoptee I have many thoughts and feelings regarding Korea's recent recognition of adoptees. While I myself am a Chinese adoptee, I feel it is important to discuss the implications of this news and the impact it has had on the adoptee community as a whole.
Many transracial adoptees grow up as ‘other’, always being too much or not enough of an ethnicity to belong anywhere. We are required to renounce citizenship of our biological culture and be indoctrinated into the foreign country of our parents. To my knowledge most adoptees are not dual citizens between a biological country and their adoptive culture.
An adoptee I talked with once described transnational adoption papers as being like a one way ticket - pushing a child out of the country with no expectations of a return trip, instead to be forgotten by the biological country entirely.
In the past few weeks Korea has acknowledged its role in sending away children since the 1950s for international adoption. Included in this recognition is the understanding that families were divided and lied to, documents were falsified, redacted and restricted access. Previously, any recognition was considered a negative view of a nation and thus incredibly unlikely.
However, this recognition is bittersweet. Many different events, policies and beliefs made transnational adoption ‘beneficial’. For example, China's one child policy paired with a cultural belief that sons are ‘better’ has resulted in China now having a severe gender imbalance. A countless number of girls are missing from China's population due to unrealistic policies, unequal policy enforcement, infantiside and international adoption profit margins.
To be recognised is an incredible step because it validates that our (adoptees) experiences are relevant in a culture's history, regardless of the optics. Often stories of adoption are from the adoptive parents point of view. However, being acknowledged is telling a dominant negative through adoptee voices. Telling our own stores is key because we are the ones that live through the differences, experiences and the emotions that accompany the journey. We are the experts in our own stories.
Personally, I would love for China to follow Korea's example and offer a level of affirmation to the adoptees that were sent away. To allow those that seek it - a path to recovering biological roots, a sense of cultural belonging and a stronger sense of self. However, I am sceptical of this becoming reality. This realization in itself, sadly, makes me feel further from my biological origins than I ever have.
Adoption as a concept is more complex than most people ever consider it to be. There is always more to consider, learn, hear and understand.
I am speaking from my own life experiences and opinions as a transracial adoptee. Please recognise everyone is entitled to their own views and may have different experiences.
