Asian Heritage

In honor of May being Asian heritage month I want to share part of my story and some of my thoughts.

I was adopted in October of 1998 from Anhui China at 16 months old. The orphanage gave me the name Zang, Shuang Fang. In characters, 张双芳

I grew up knowing I was Chinese, though, I often denied it because I wanted to fit in. I often described myself as a ‘banana’ for lack of a better explanation of my genetics or why I was in a ‘white’ family and not an Asian one.

Some days I want to answer in detail every question posed to me. Other days I want to tell the world to mind its own business. Where I am from, who my family is or how I decide to identify is my own prerogative. I think this mind game will always be part of my reality. I have gotten better at juggling and understanding these emotions over the years.

In the past few months I have been exploring and learning more about my biological culture, biology and a lot of other nuances of my adoption.

I have loved connecting with various adoptee groups, hearing other adoptee and transracial adoptee stories. I have discovered that while our lives may have diverged from a similar origin we each live individual lives and have different feelings, ways of expressing ourselves, beliefs and values.

Personally, my family instilled the mantra, “it’s nice to be important. But it’s more important to be nice.”

While this story is a work in progress, I am glad to be on this journey. For those along for the whole ride or just a short segment, thank you for helping make me who I am today.

I am growing in my understanding of myself and how to be comfortable acknowledging my Asian heritage with the open mind and respect I would give to anyone else.

Thanks for reading and happy Asian heritage month.